February was bad enough losing my much loved Orange Cat........
On the 22 March in the evening after beginning to worry as I had not heard from her, I broke into my beautiful girlfriend's flat next door to me & found her dead on the floor...........Just 38 years old!
She died of sepsis caused by a peptic gastric perforated ulcer, a nasty open wound on her right leg left untreated by useless doctors practice (Already under investigation & monitoring by the Care Quality Commission) Indeed the same "Practice" that misdiagnosed my mini strokes as Epilepsy & stuck me 2000mg a DAY of epilim tablets - But that's another story...........
Sorry this post is a bit "Scatty" but this has hit me so hard & only now by sharing my grief does it make things a tiny bit easier.....
My beautiful Diana was just 38 she taught me that despite my disability, I was still really special & that I was worth so much more than I believed after the stroke 6 years ago!
This was a real slow burner, I always thought she was kind of cute but had no idea at all that we would fall in love - We both wanted to stay very private until we were ready to tell the world we were in love............
This is difficult to write & finding the right words to explain how fooking painful this is - One minute we were sharing love & laughter (A lot of laughing & just being together) Diana was the sunshine in my life that just wanted to be with me no matter what! What were my chances of ever meeting a girl like her?? Not great I know - When you become ill or have permanent problems, most just give you a wide birth sad to say!
Not Diana though who made me so happy even if only for a short time - This woman made me smile properly since the evil stroke damage 6 years ago - Never thought I would ever smile properly again...........
Diana was from Lithuania & I loved everything about her, an amazing girl that I had the privilege of her sharing my life & loving me for who I am......It doesn't happen very often in a lifetime!
I am happy to report that her body was flown home to her family who have been so supportive & kind, they knew about us & are all lovely people & her going home meant everything to me as I dreaded a lonely funeral here..........
As I stated earlier, Diana's death has hit me hard although it took a couple of days after finding her to really accept the awful realisation that I would never see her again, wake up with her or go out on one of our crazy shopping expeditions! The pain is just so hard to deal with but I cannot be upset forever, she would not want me to be in tears every day or going through such a shitee time & I know that 100% My sense of loss is so great & I'm really trying to pick myself up again..........
Anyway, this post is not about me - It's about my beautiful girl & my love for her & sense of loss without her........
Maybe we'll meet again one day? I'm not a great believer but would do anything just to have her back again..........
Thanks for reading, this is why I have been so quiet for the last month.............
On the 22 March in the evening after beginning to worry as I had not heard from her, I broke into my beautiful girlfriend's flat next door to me & found her dead on the floor...........Just 38 years old!
She died of sepsis caused by a peptic gastric perforated ulcer, a nasty open wound on her right leg left untreated by useless doctors practice (Already under investigation & monitoring by the Care Quality Commission) Indeed the same "Practice" that misdiagnosed my mini strokes as Epilepsy & stuck me 2000mg a DAY of epilim tablets - But that's another story...........
Sorry this post is a bit "Scatty" but this has hit me so hard & only now by sharing my grief does it make things a tiny bit easier.....
My beautiful Diana was just 38 she taught me that despite my disability, I was still really special & that I was worth so much more than I believed after the stroke 6 years ago!
This was a real slow burner, I always thought she was kind of cute but had no idea at all that we would fall in love - We both wanted to stay very private until we were ready to tell the world we were in love............
This is difficult to write & finding the right words to explain how fooking painful this is - One minute we were sharing love & laughter (A lot of laughing & just being together) Diana was the sunshine in my life that just wanted to be with me no matter what! What were my chances of ever meeting a girl like her?? Not great I know - When you become ill or have permanent problems, most just give you a wide birth sad to say!
Not Diana though who made me so happy even if only for a short time - This woman made me smile properly since the evil stroke damage 6 years ago - Never thought I would ever smile properly again...........
Diana was from Lithuania & I loved everything about her, an amazing girl that I had the privilege of her sharing my life & loving me for who I am......It doesn't happen very often in a lifetime!
I am happy to report that her body was flown home to her family who have been so supportive & kind, they knew about us & are all lovely people & her going home meant everything to me as I dreaded a lonely funeral here..........
As I stated earlier, Diana's death has hit me hard although it took a couple of days after finding her to really accept the awful realisation that I would never see her again, wake up with her or go out on one of our crazy shopping expeditions! The pain is just so hard to deal with but I cannot be upset forever, she would not want me to be in tears every day or going through such a shitee time & I know that 100% My sense of loss is so great & I'm really trying to pick myself up again..........
Anyway, this post is not about me - It's about my beautiful girl & my love for her & sense of loss without her........
Maybe we'll meet again one day? I'm not a great believer but would do anything just to have her back again..........
Thanks for reading, this is why I have been so quiet for the last month.............
:'-(
She was my soul mate no question & walked into my world & made it so much more than it ever was!!
